Sometimes you just can't ignore the signs.
It was a year and a half ago that I began to work at the Black Pit of Doom. On my first day there, I met a kind man named Robert, who as far as I can guess is probably about 60 years old. I instantly found him very intriguing. For me, he was just the kind of person that you know you could be friends with, or have a lot in common with, but you don't really know why. I wanted to learn more about Robert, but he is very private and almost evasive in the way he answers questions about himself. So in a year and a half of working together, I only know a handful of details about him personally. He, however, was always very interested in talking to me and we would have pleasant, if superficial, conversations.
Now, those of you who know me personally know that I've been on a sort of spiritual quest as of late (say, the last year or so). I have come to realize that the ultimate source of my unhappiness is a spritual sickness, a separation from God, and a tendency to look outside of myself, especially to other people, to try and fill this void. Long story short, that doesn't work, and I've been seeking a way to mend this spiritual rift that I have with my true self and with my Higher Power. One way that I've been doing that is by reading. I found a book which I really connected with, which addresses this issue from a spiritual perspective as "the human condition;" i.e. the result of The Fall, ect. It is Co-Dependence: Healing the Human Condition by Charles L. Whitfield. Fascinating and practical, the book has given me some information on what the problem of co-dependency is and how what recovery means. For further spiritual insight, the book references and recommends on several occasions A Course In Miracles, an anonomously written book published by the Foundation for Inner Peace. I decided that I would buy this book before I quit working at the Black Pit of Doom.
Fast-forward to today, my last day EVER working at the Black Pit of Doom (yay! As a side note, I discussed with Conrad yesterday that my job was really not that bad, it was just my attitude towards the job and the associations I made to it.) I came in this morning and immediately went to my information terminal to look up the book and see if we had it. The computer pulled up many different versions and printings as well as some supplemental literature. At that moment, I was called away from the computer by some other task and Robert walked back into my department to "wish [me] a fond farewell" and also to use my computer. He walked over to it and said, "who's looking for A Course In Miracles?" I said that I was, and he said, "It's one of my favorite books. I've read that book probably half a dozen times and when I found it, I felt like I finally found what I'd been looking for all my life. It really changed me."
"Strange that you would seek that book on the last day you're here," he said as he walked off.
I wrote him a card and left my contact info. I hope that this is not the last time we speak. I haven't opened the book yet, but I think all this bodes well for what it might reveal. How fateful. I'm getting all Lost on you guys now.
April
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Reader Comments (3)
I am so happy for you! That you have found "A Course in Miracles" is such an awesome blessing. You have found what you have always been looking for! Now, "Go the Distance"
Blessings!
I'm sorry you didn't exactly love your time at Barnes & Noble, or, as you put it, The Black Pit of Doom [that made me giggle]. I wish you could have worked in the bookstore more; I think you would have been great there just like you were in Music. Music, by the way, will not be the same without you.
Keep in touch. :-)
--Mike V.